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| Quick, to the shops !! |
Hello everyone, has it been a week already? how time flies when your having fun. Anyway without further ado lets get cracking with this weeks thrilling instalment of Deans Weekly Blog. In this weeks edition Dean rages, Dean gets horny, and Dean rages again. So whats this weeks first topic under the spotlight. Well for most people last weekend (and also as I'm actually typing this) it snowed. The general consensus amongst my friends was "Yaaaay snow" but then Britain's age old problem of being able to deal with a natural phenomenon that has been occurring since the dawn of time (4004BC if your a creationist, millions of years ago if your not mental) resurfaced. Why is it at the first sign of snow half of the nation panics. This brings me back towards one of my previous rages of old people panic buying. So the weatherman forecasts that it might snow a little bit, what do you do? make sure you have a shovel lying around so you can clear the paths, how about make sure that before setting out on a journey you make sure you are wrapped up warm and your phone is charged in case you get stuck. No the answer is of course go to the local shop, buy 15 loaves of bread and 40 pints of milk. Why? why is milk and bread the answer to everything in the world. Maybe we should point this fact out to the Arab protesters around the world who are being repressed and killed by their governments. Don't worry about it mate, just pop yourself down to the shop buy 4 loaves, enough milk to get bathed in and everything will be fine.Seriously it drives me bonkers. This is the generation that lived and survived during the war whilst rationing was in force. They could feed a family of 5 on three cans of beans, a tin of pilchards and a loaf of bread for three weeks. A feat that was only ever surpassed by Jesus with his loaves and fishes banquet. Why is it nowadays the same generation can't survive one day of wintry weather without at first stocking up on 25 loaves and 75 litres of milk.Here's my advice for when it snows, don't go to the shops and buy everything in there just in case, pick the phone up, ring your grandchildren and take them to a local hill with a sledge and HAVE FUN. Its only snow.
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| Phwooooor !!! |
Today a female colleague of mine who shall remain nameless (Sarah) showed my her long platted pony tail and remarked that she looked like Lara Croft. I had to cut her short at this point and explain that she shouldn't go any further with this line of conversation. Why?? because I've got a unhealthy obsession with the lovely Miss Croft. Now I can hear everyone shouting at the computer now (Weirdo, perv etc... ) but I don't care in my mind Lara Croft is almost my ultimate woman (Wrong hair colour). So what if she's computer generated and doesn't actually exist. Think about it for a minute. Every part of her has been loving designed from the way her ponytail swishes about whilst she's moving, to the sexy little bum wiggle walk that she used to do. The way those little shorts hug those perfectly shaped hips. and of course the great big 9mm pistols strapped to her thighs (I bet you thought I was gonna say something else then .. HA). So what if she was created from the mind of some spotty nerd programmer sat behind a desk surround by dungeons and dragons figures. Who better to design the perfect woman than a man who could never aspire to meet such a woman in real life and instead has to generate a 3D rendered model of his perfect woman. Is it wrong to lust after a computer generated image? Probably. Do I care? No. Do I need professional help?, more than likely. By the way this is not a revelation, to people who know me ask my ex wife (Editorial point. This isn't the reason why I have an Ex wife although It may have contributed to it ... JOKING)
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| WTF !!! |
Also this week I've been doing a lot of signing up to newsletters, forums etc for work. But most times whilst filing the form in at the end you have to enter a captcha code to continue. If you haven't come across one yet, its a randomly generated image of words disguised to stop bots entering information. Its designed so that only a human can read it to type the correct code in. And here in lies my major problem with it. The captcha codes generated nowadays are that disguised that you probably have a 1 in 10 chance of actually making out one letter, let alone the whole damn word. Now I'm not sure if its just me that can't make them out, or are they almost like those stupid magic eye pictures from a few years ago, that you had to stare at for three hours to see an image appear (I could never do those as well). So after staring at them for a while I still can't make them out. So you refresh the captcha in the hope that you can make out the next one. No such luck after cycling through about 8 of the bloody things you end up having to press the assistance key, and that makes you feel retarded. I can understand the concept behind the captcha to stop a bot from completing a form. but they are getting so advanced that even humans now can't decipher them. Encryption gone too far? maybe, or maybe I'm just losing the ability to read mixed up squashed indecipherable words.
This Blog is a Deans twisted mind production and is brought to you in conjunction with paracetamol 500mg tablets. mmmmm pain relief
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Gamer 4 Life
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