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| Nerd at work !! |
Greetings fellow humans, and welcome to this weeks edition of my weekly blog. Its the place where I usually look at everyday things, and geeky things and offer my sideways view on them. But of course you already know this as you read it every week, DON'T YOU !!. Firstly I'll apologise again for the lateness of the blog. I usually try my hardest to get it all done and posted by Friday afternoon. But of course you already know this as you read it every week, DON'T YOU !!. But yet again I have found myself with no time to do anything at all again. I'm beginning to think that someone up there is messing about with time as there really doesn't seem to be enough hours in a day to get everything done. But anyway this week I have been up to my eyes in testing at work before we finally go live. Now I used to imagine that testers used to have the best job in the world (or at least that's what my brother convinced me when he was games testing). But I've spent the past week or so trying my hardest to test every possible outcome to check that everything works. The funny thing about testing as well is you have to park what you know outside. And act like you are stupid. Someone somewhere will always press the wrong button or enter the wrong command, and you have to plan for this eventuality. Its also bloody hard work, and after endless hours of staring at screens I think my eyeballs have rotated and are now looking inside my head. (Ooooh look at all that pink goo). And I'm convinced that thinking like an idiot has had a side effect on me that I can't shake.
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| If only there was a way in ??? |
Speaking of idiots I was highly amused this week. What is it with people and doors. Now here's a fact for you (well it came from Wikipedia so it may not actually be true). Doors were used by the ancient Egyptians as far back in history as records go. (you know the ancient Egyptians, the ones who believed that the earth came into being from one of there deities masturbating) yes even the ancient Egyptians understood the concept of the door. Its a very simple concept to be honest. It usually consists of a hole in something and you usually need to be able for the hole to be open at times, and to be able to close it at other times. Let me give you an example. To be able to enter your home you need a hole in the bricks to be able to get inside (or wood if your American). Now this is the easy bit as a hole is easily made. So you pass through the hole to get inside your lovely home. But wait a minute, now your inside, there is a great big hole in the wall, letting cold in and possibly wolves. How do I block the hole up. Well you could fill the hole in with bricks, but then how would you get back outside again?? what you need is some sort of system that lets you cover the hole up when you're inside or outside, but is easy to open up again when you want to pass through. Hence the door. a marvellous invention that fulfils all the above criteria. Modern doors can even come made from glass. And they also have handles on them. The tricky part though. (and this is the reason why I'm writing this) Is knowing which way opens the door, do you have to push, pull or even slide the door to get through. So faced with a door with no markings on it to indicate which way the door works you are faced with a choice. Its statistically almost a 50:50 choice if you remove sliding doors from the equation (I mean we all don't live aboard the Starship Enterprise, and if you did the doors would open automatically for you and make a very cool SHHHHHH sound) so what do you do when faced with this dilemma push or pull. Well you would assume that most people would try one and if that didn't work try the other. NO, i was witness to someone pulling on a door that needed pushing to open. The smart thing to do would be to realise that pulling doesn't work, so you would push. NO this person pulled on it again, and again and again. Then with a look of confusion in his eyes, starts looking around for another entrance thinking that the door that is in front of him is not actually a door. After a few seconds of bewilderment, they then go back to the door and try pulling again, and again, and again. Then they start looking around for someone to help them pass through this impenetrable fortress. Upon which point someone shouts across the room "Push mate". so he did and hey presto, the door opened (It wasn't magic, or voodoo or witchcraft, it was simple physics).
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| Its not big or clever |
Also this week if you're friends with me on facebook, you may have noticed some rather unsavoury status updates from me, or should I say from my so called friends, with a little help from my teenage son. One of the girls in the office decided to try and log into my facebook on my phone whilst I was out of the office. I did have a passcode on but my son decided to tell her the passcode and hence the hilarious statuses from that day. After this happened the obvious thing to do was to change the passcode on my phone which I did. Unfortunately the next day Lewis somehow managed to guess what I'd changed it to, and cue Ben deciding to facebook rape me again. The funny thing is have you ever noticed that people that rape your facebook profile always put comments about being gay or homosexual remarks. I think that actually this is very telling on the people that are doing this. There are loads of insults that could be thrown around, but instead it's always "I love cock" or something like that. What this is saying is that the people around me who think its funny to facebook rape me are all actually latent homosexuals themselves.
Anyway sorry for the lateness again of the blog due to work, random Internet dropouts and furry things with four legs. But next week hopefully I'll be on time (as British Rail often said)
Till then
Dean
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