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| 1970's 21st century toy |
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Hello again, and welcome to this weeks edition of Deans Weekly Blog 1 of your 5 a day. Have you ever noticed that everything at the moment is retro. Now I'm liking this at lot. A few years ago it was seen as rather uncool to be somewhat nerdy and geeky. Now all of a sudden its high fashion again.Gone are the days that you get scoffed at for trying to have a debate with someone about the things that nerds care about, like who shot first? Han or Greedo or who is better Captain Kirk or Captain Picard. All of a sudden these things are in vogue again. with the release of the Star Wars saga on Blu-Ray a whole new generation of people are experiencing the films that as a child changed my perspective on life forever. In the fast information laden society the next generation (Star Trek reference -- 10 points) are not as moved by the vision set out in these films because society has begun to accept a lot of the ideas and has almost turned them into an archetype. Where am I going with this, well now the next generation have experienced this they are hungry for information. Where better to go to find this information. NERDS. we have been walking around discussing the finer points of every detail for the last 30 years our heads are jam packed full with obscure technical references and the answer to almost all of the questions asked. The retro effect has taken over the consumer market now as well. That old Commodore 64 that is in a box in the bottom of the wardrobe is now a highly sort after piece of retro art. My favourite toy from when I was younger, BIG TRAK is now being resold after over 30 years. Now when I was a child ( A long time ago ... In a galaxy far away -- Star Wars reference 10 points) BIG TRAK was a toy. I used to steal my baby sisters toys, put them in the optional tipping trailer and program BIG TRAK to do a full circuit of the room, carefully avoiding the dog lying on the floor and the coffee table, and deliver the toys back to my sisters crib. That was the highlight of being a child. Now you can get them again as a Retro Gadget, people see them and think wow that's a cool bit of tech. I was playing with it 30 years ago. That makes me and others like me the height of cool. Unfortunately the down side to this phenomenon is that in a couple of years time it will fall out of favour again and nerds will be seen again as that weird kid with the DVD collection of every episode of Firefly, but we will not change for we are Nerds and proud.
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| I love the way your blood spurts from your neck ! |
Vampires, what is it with nearly every woman that I know being slightly obsessed with vampires, I know what has kick started all this adoration for the undead, Since the twilight series of books and films have been out, women have suddenly come to the conclusion that vampires are sexy. Now call me a bitter old man if you will, but I fail to see the attraction. Its not just the actors that are making vampires seem sexy. Its the idea of the lifestyle that vampires are portrayed as young, sexy people with hardly any clothes, having sexy parties and being very liberal with their loving. First let me clarify for all those teenage fans out there that swoon if you mention the name Edward. Vampires are not real. and even if they were real, think about it for a minute. to become a vampire you have to be turned into one by an existing vampire. In most vampire lore this involves having your neck penetrated and blood being mixed in to your jugular vein. Hardly sexy in my book running around with a great big piece of flesh missing from your neck, or at least two massive puncture wounds that lets face it, If when you become a vampire blood is still pumped around your body to allow the muscles to function would result in 3 ft plumes of arterial blood spraying from the wounds. Mmmmm sexy. Also consider for the fact that being undead for 400 years or so would result in lets just say hygiene problems. I doubt that after laying in a coffin for a couple of hundred years would result in them smelling like roses, more like putrefied flesh. Still think they re sexy? Lets not forget the final fact about vampires, they cannot go out in sunlight. Imagine after 400 years of living underground you would be rather pale in skin tone. Gone would be the bronzed tan look, that every woman aspires to own. Instead everyone would look like they had been dipped in a bucket of whitewash. Finally to hammer home my point, I'm going to tell you a story about a girl that I read on the Internet (So it must be true). A girl that was so obsessed with vampires she believed that by cutting herself and drinking her own blood for three years that she had become a true vampire. That's not that bad I hear you say, well she had a new boyfriend and decided that she would turn him into a vampire as well so they could spend the rest of eternity together. So secretly she saved her menstrual discharge and mixed it into her boyfriends meals, under the mistaken illusion that because her boyfriend was eating her blood, and she was a vampire, he would eventually turn. All this without him even knowing. Now tell me vampires are sexy !!
And finally I believe that I have discovered the solution to most of the worlds problems. Comedy, In this depressing month where everyone is worrying about paying of the bills from Christmas, or whether or not their job is secure. Just take a minute out put on something that makes you laugh out loud (or lol), sit back and relax and laugh away, you'll find that for that fleeting moment all your worries disappear. So when you're feeling blue, and can't go on anymore. Sit back and watch Del Boy and Rodney, trying very carefully to remove a massive chandelier from a stately home only to have the one in the other room crash down to the floor and smash to pieces. You won't care if the credit card bill is overdue whilst your watching the Monty python team galloping around the English countryside pretending to ride horses and making the clip clops noises with coconuts. Go on find something that makes you laugh, and get absorbed in the moment. I guarantee for whilstever your watching, you'll be smiling and not worrying.
Anyway time to go, I'll be back next week with more crazy ramblings ... ttfn
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